From the Chicago Tribune, Family section.  6/20/99

One requirement for summer: Time to goof off

By Janna L. Graber

Like most American kids, 10-year-old Cory Goyer of Columbia Falls,

Mont., loves summertime.

"There's more to do in summer," says the 5th grader. "You have lots of

 free time. You can play soccer or baseball. And when you pretend, you

can do anything you want."

Although some parents may be tempted to fill those free hours with

camp, lessons and other activities, experts say that unscheduled free

time is a beneficial learning time for kids. Children need downtime

for imaginative play, daydreams and relaxation.

Kids need a break from their work, just like adults do, says Nicole

Hoffman, coordinator of Child and Family Development at the Adler

Psychological Services Center in Chicago. "Downtime gives children

time to relax and blow off steam rather than feeling like they have to

perform in structured activities such as sports, dance or computer

camp," Hoffman says.

According to Hoffman, parents often believe that by scheduling

numerous activities, they are giving children the opportunity to "be

more and have more."

"Our society has become more of a 'doing' rather than a 'being'

society," Hoffman says. In other words, our society sends people the

message, "The more you do and have, the more you are." Although

parents may think that offering numerous activities is "the very best"

for their children, in fact, they may be sending the wrong message.

"When the emphasis is on doing more, being more, and competition,

children often hear the message, 'When you perform you are

worthwhile,' rather than, 'Being you makes you worthwhile,' " Hoffman

says.

Free time also sparks creativity and initiative.

"Many parents today believe that the best way to keep children out of

trouble is by keeping them occupied with structured activities,"

Hoffman says. The danger of that thinking, she believes, is that

overscheduled children will miss out on all the developmental benefits

of free, unstructured play.

Jan Drucker, director of the Child Development Institute at Sarah

Lawrence College in Bronxville, N.Y., says that what adults label as

"just play" may instead be essential exploration and invention.

"When kids create imaginative worlds, like pretending to be a mommy,

that is a complex activity. It involves intellectual, imaginative and

cognitive activities as well as developing language and social skills.

Imaginative play is the first real place where you can see the mind at

work."

Children often explore their interests and capabilities through play.

Some children like venturing out into the great outdoors, while others

may prefer to create elaborate playtime fantasies.

Imaginative play is something parents should encourage and even

protect, Drucker says. She believes that the trend toward early

academics and the popularity of computerized games and other

structured activities may put free play in peril.

"Children who don't have time to relax and structure their own time

are deprived," Drucker says. This lack of downtime can become a big

issue when a child reaches middle school.

"(Children in middle school) often have their school day very

structured and then have after-school activities. This may leave kids

feeling deprived of time to themselves to do what they want. They may

cooperate with the structure at school, but then rebel against the

structure at home."

Cathy Swan, a parenting skills instructor in Portland, Ore., for

Kaiser Permanente, a national HMO, says she often addresses the issue

of downtime in her classes.

"When children don't have their own free time, they become extremely

dependent on stimulus," Swan says. "Children may become vacant,

waiting to be turned on. They won't be self-motivated or curious

without some sort of positive feedback. And I think that's

dangerous."

Swan suggests that when parents do offer play ideas to their children,

the "work" should be a little challenging. This encourages kids to try

new things on their own.

"Don't abandon your child if he gets frustrated (with the new task),"

she says. "Give a little help when it's needed, and then get out of

the way again. Kids need the chance to struggle with something. Then

they can become creative thinkers -- inventive and investigative. They

gain perseverance in the face of adversity. Children who struggle with

concepts or activities and then accomplish the task on their own have

a sense of self-accomplishment."

As every parent knows, children left to their own devices often make a

big mess in the process of creating a masterpiece. But Swan believes

that parents should try to get beyond that.

"Acceptance of your child's efforts is important," Swan says.

"Encourage the process, not the end product. And don't dampen your

child's efforts by overcorrecting or even overpraising. Just give them

the tools they need to be creative and let them go. Small children may

need their own little space near you, or maybe low shelves for their

supplies."

That initial investment on the parent's time can pay off.

"Encouraging children to play on their own gives them more

independence and the parents more freedom," Swan says.

Hoffman believes that open play helps children learn to entertain

themselves rather than expect others to entertain them.

"They also learn how to interact with their peers and negotiate how

they will spend their time rather than having this be imposed by a

schedule," she says.

Lori McMahon, a preschool teacher and mother of two in suburban

Denver, agrees.

"When kids complain that they're bored, especially kids who live in

very structured environments, they're saying, 'I'm waiting for you to

tell me what to do,' " McMahon says. "Many parents cave in here and

think they have to solve the problem. But this is the child's problem,

and he has to solve it. If you can get past that initial whining, kids

will come up with things you never would have thought of."

McMahon's oldest son, Jake, is a good example of how children can use

their free time creatively. Last summer the 10-year-old spent hours

creating an elaborate racing track for his gerbils. Other times, Jake

says, he spends hours outside playing paleontologist.

That outdoor play is essential, says John Harris, executive director

of the Monadnock Institute of Nature, Place and Culture at Franklin

Pierce College in Rindge, N.H.

"Unstructured play outdoors cultivates a sense of wonder and sows the

seeds for a deep appreciation of the natural world later on," Harris

says. "Discovering and handling the unknown, and playing and figuring

things out, create a self-confidence that more and more children seem

to need."

This is good news for kids who love to spend hours outside, gazing at

the clouds or running in the grass. But there are some who might

condemn these activities as a frivolous waste of time. As a result of

that view, Harris says, many elementary children spend less than an

hour a week outdoors.

"It doesn't look like teaching when you let young children wander off

near a stream to flip over stones, wedge their toes into muck, or

climb an overhanging tree," Harris says. "But outdoor play forms a

counter-friction to the passivity of TV and the other technology

thrills prevalent indoors. In my experience, after the initial

half-hour of being bored, kids begin to look, listen, grasp and touch.

Most importantly, they slow down and explore with concentrated

delight."

Finding family downtime isn't always easy, especially when both

parents work.

"Weekends are crucial times for families to connect and kids to

explore," Harris says. "Even those who are involved in organized

sports have time for unstructured play. Most of the places where they

go for their games--soccer fields or softball parks--are perfect

facilities for solitary exploration. A picnic after the game and time

for children to check out the nearby stream or climb a tree out of

sight of the parents provides a good antidote to competition and

structure."

Although there is nothing wrong with occasionally letting children

watch age-appropriate videos or TV shows, Hoffman says, TV should not

be considered downtime.

"Television watching doesn't allow for children to play interactively

with their peers," she says. "And when watching TV, children are being

entertained rather than learning how to entertain themselves."

That inability to be alone can become a problem later in life. Suzanne

Boyd, a 43-year-old parent from Glencoe, saw this firsthand during a

three-day solo Outward Bound mountain adventure.

"Several people found it unbearable to be by themselves. They felt

that they didn't have the capacity to rely on only their own being for

inspiration, support and entertainment," Boyd says. "Everything is so

focused on children having social skills, but learning to like your

own company is equally, if not more, important."

For children in day care, however, that alone time can be hard to come

by.

"Children who are in day care on a full-time basis typically have less

downtime," Hoffman says. Many day-care centers address this problem by

purposefully scheduling more playtime. Parents who have children in

day care also can help by encouraging downtime on weekends and in the

evening.

"For example," Hoffman says, "rather than allowing children to veg out

in front of the TV the entire evening, encourage routine use of

reading, listening to music or quiet activities to wind down from the

day."

In addition, she says, families can incorporate these downtime

activities into a family event.

In some neighborhoods, summertime playmates can be hard to find.

Children may be so busy with planned summer activities that it becomes

difficult to round up enough friends for a game of baseball. To combat

this problem, Hoffman suggests that parents build networks with other

parents.

"This way," she says, "parents can discuss issues they believe are

important to their children and work together to achieve them."

Parents might even want to talk to their neighbors about scheduling

free time for the kids to play together.

Harris believes that there is often peer pressure for kids--and their

parents--to join structured activities. "Once a few kids in town join

organized teams, it's difficult for the others to remain on the

sidelines."

Still, he says, parents who experienced the benefits of downtime as

children will stand firm on providing it to their own kids. And for

those parents who have forgotten the benefits of all the free hours

they had to play, Harris suggests taking a walk down memory lane.

"Parents might recollect their first adventure with a tree, their

favorite secret place, or their interaction with water before they

began school," Harris says. "If nothing else, this exercise helps

parents remember the joy they likely experienced in solitude at this

age."

There are several cautions, however, for parents regarding downtime.

"Unstructured play doesn't mean unsupervised play," Hoffman says.

"Always know where your children are and what they are doing."

And too much of a good thing is never good -- even with free time.

"Stress a balance between structured activities and downtime," Hoffman

says.